iRADiX

Be YOURSELF

Within a week of stepping into the department, our new residents get an earful of my “Welcome lecture” which lasts a full one hour. This is in the form of the “Ten Commandments” (often many more)! The first of these commandments, that gets repeated several times in the course of that one hour is –

Thou Shall Not Cheat!

I would like to hope that the residents stick to all these commandments – well - at least the first of the big list -and do not cheat - I hope they will not cheat on their patients, their teachers and most of all do not cheat themselves. I wonder if you have noticed it lately, but it suddenly dawned on me one day that no matter how hard you try, you cannot cheat yourself!! (As my residents say this is RR’s latest ‘One liner’; “God knows, how he comes up with these stupid ones”).

So when I see them explaining things patiently to patients, writing and answering calls politely and doing what I tell them to do.. I feel great - glibly feeling that my residents really do listen to what I say. Not that, it happens all the time - once in a while, I catch them lying (most commonly about a patient’s history which they never asked) and admonish them for not following the “First Commandment”.

In the olden days, when I used to be younger and had stamina to run around the department and was not addicted to computers and digital images , I would walk around the department a lot – often at odd times. Some of my older residents had a nice name for me – “The Ghost who walks”. So, they were always on their guard about what they said and did. Not any longer – I am often in my den and residents can be care-free.

It is all fine in normal times. Every one has their best foot forward and best face towards you. Unfortunately, many of us manage to hide the real “me” from public view and especially from the chief. It takes difficult times to test people and bring out the “true them”. And it happens when their normal routine is disturbed.

And so, not infrequently when I am not in their FOV but within ear shot, I see their true colors. Residents screaming at patients… and just plain ignoring them or picking a fight with a fellow resident from – say - OBGYN… they would not have dared do had they known the ‘Phantom’ was around. So I call them aside – give them a lecture on how it is important to be polite. even though the situation may be exasperating “I know it can difficult“ I say, ”But you should always try to be nice to patients; they are here not because they want to be here, but because they have to be” And I am off on my way thinking… ,”This must be an aberration… may he/she had bad night on call last night” and I think no more about it….

And one day, usually towards the end of a term, I ask around with my faculty and Chief resident about continuing some of residents for the 3^rd or 4^th years as supernumerary residents. What I hear then is often quite shocking.

So and so.. (who I may have so far thought to me a great guy or a sweet girl) gets painted as demon incarnate. He/She is rude to patients and other residents – shouts at residents from other departments… does not follow patients-up .is truant on call, ‘bats’ calls…..the list is unending.. Some of these are universal observations, others though are colored by personal bias; some others are doomed in an faculty’s cussedness…but at the end of the day you see a pattern and …I am shocked and disappointed. “Oh! they have let me down” I lament …….

Not because they shouted at a patient or a colleague or refused a call but because they thought it necessary to lie about it; because they felt it is more important to appear to be right than be truthful and especially because they pretended to be what they were not.

But, then what do you expect from 25 year olds who are mortally scared of what his/her teacher would do if he knew the truth; what if teacher chose to be vindictive… what if …... the list is unending

As teachers therefore, it is important for us to impress on our students how it is important to be truthful when they deal with patients and peers; for, this is the springboard of academic integrity. Ignore this and we are grooming megalomaniacs who think nothing of fudging data or palgiarising text….

It is important for us to stress that even as you can cheat on your parents, child or spouse and teachers, there is nothing called as cheating oneself. For, if you do that, at the end of the day when you hit the pillow, the deceit and shame of it all will unfold before your own drooping eyes!